To my superman <3

Have you ever done something you wish you hadn't? And after you think why did I do that and wish there was a way to change it back. That's exactly how I feel right now. I tend to be a person that over reacts over the smallest things. I wish I wasn't that way because now I think I lost the one guy that means the most to me. All because I over reacted. I started my internship a month ago and since then I never got to see my boyfriend because we were both working full time but opposite schedules. So we went from seeing each other about 5 times a week to only 1-2 times a week and that was the hardest thing for me to adjust to. Being with someone for 3 1/2 years and being with each other all the time and then not being able to see them and barely even talk hit me hard. I thought that me starting my internship and finishing school would be great for our relationship and it turned out to be the complete opposite. I just hated when I would look forward to seeing or talking to him, and he wasn't there. He started just going out with his friends/coworkers all the time instead and I felt like I became last in his life and that hurt. I wish I hadn't pushed him away like I did because I don't want to love anyone else. He was the one for me from day one. He always knew how to brighten my day and make me smile so much my cheeks would cramp. He was the one I wanted to fall asleep to and wake up next to. He's where I feel safe and where I can escape all the pain the my life. The one person I feel like when I'm with him all my problems just disappear and I feel like I'm going to be okay. He's one of the most caring, generous, loving and supportive men I know, and I've always admired that about him. He has always taken care if his family and been there for his friends when they need someone and even been there for my family and most of all me. He's my real life superman and I wish I could have him back in my life. We have been through pretty much every obstacle life can throw at you together and have found a way to climb over each one. I guess when I start to feel like I'm losing what I have good in my life, my guard goes right up and I prepare myself to lose what I have. All my life people have come and gone. And most of all the ones I had always loved and cared about the most have always left my life. It's something I have become to used to. I just wish for once someone would stay in my life that meant the world to me. I'm tired of feeling alone. I wish life came with a rewind button so I could go back to Wednesday and not have over reacted and pushed the man I love away. All I ever wanted was to finally finish school and find a job so I could be able to put more into our relationship. I've never made a lot of money, so my bf really was the one that supported everything we did. I helped out as much as I could with things. But I always looked forward to the day I could be like no I got this or be able to pay for my half. He has brought so much fun into my life. He had taught me how to live again. He has always been the one person besides my family I knew I could depend on, and pretty much the only person I could talk to about anything at all. He has seen my at my prettiest and most of all my ugliest and excepted me for who I was inside and out. I always pictured myself marrying him one day and having kids with him. I wanted that so badly. If I could I would re-do this last month and start over and find a way to make it work. He is the man for me and I don't want to lose him for good. If I could have one wish it would be to have the one person that knows me best back into my life. I want that happily ever after with him. I just wish it wasn't too late. <3

To my Super Woman<3

Ever since I can remember my mother has been my hero. It has always been the two of us since I was two years old, and just like any single mother she did everything she could to provide and be the best mom she could to take care of her child. When I was 4 I became best friends with another little girl that lived in the same apartment complex and supposedly we hooked our parents up and just like a fairy tale my best friend became my sister. By gaining a new sister, I also gained a new dad and most of all a man that treated my mom with love and respect. A few years later we had the most important addition to our family, our little sister Amanda who became the glue that held our family together.

Now I know everyone says they have a great mom and Im sure they do, but I must say I truly have one amazing mother. She is the type of woman that leads by example. I know I am the person I am today because of her. She is the most kind, loving, generous, and strongest woman I know. She is the kind of person that goes out of her way to help someone in need even if its a stranger on the street. She gives 110% at work, and because of that she is amazing at what she does and I hope to one day be great at my job that she is at hers. No matter how busy she was at work she always made sure to come to every single one of my water polo games and that meant the world to me because she was the one face I would look out for in the crowd, I loved knowing she was my biggest fan. My mom has always been there for me through thick and thin, she is the one person I know I can always count on to be there no matter what. Im not one to share my feelings but somehow my mom always knew when something was wrong and she would always write me a letter or make me a cd and somehow it would always be exactly how I was feeling. Sometimes I come home to find a bag of peanut m&ms or some sun chips on my bed because she knows there my favorite, just to cheer me up or let me know she was thinking of me. She has always done her best to give her family the best life possible.  

After Mandy passed away ten months ago my mom took the role of being super woman. Making her life mission to help everyone she possible could and to share the message that you are loved beyond measure, that even if you are having a tough day that the best are still to come, to never give up on life, to love everyone and most of all to choose the right! Running the pledge wall has basically become her 2nd job. Every morning she post a new inspiring quote or picture on the wall. Every day she is messaging with people from all around sharing the Choose The Right Pledge and mailing out wristbands. She has taken all of Mandys friends in under her wing and they have become daughters to our parents and little sisters to my sister Breanna and I. She's always going out of her way to make sure those girls are happy and taken care of like they are her own. Every day I try to be more like my mother. One day I hope i'll be able to inspire others and brighten a room like she can. She truly is the strongest woman I know. I feel so lucky to have a role model, best friend, and most of all mother like her in my life. There will never be enough words be able to explain how much she means to me. She is my other half and I wouldn't be complete without her. Thank you for always being there for me and your family and being the greatest example anyone could ask for. There is no doubt that you truly are Wonder Woman. I love you to the moon and back forever and always! HAPPY MOTHERS DAY MOMMY <3